Tuesday, March 18, 2008

What's Wrong with Traditional Churches? Part 2

Next in my series of "everybody's wrong but me" in church matters comes "What's wrong with traditional baptist-style churches.

Traditional Southern Baptist or Independent Baptist churches do not really have the same problems as say the traditional Lutheran or Anglican/Episcopalian churches. But a similar weakness exists.

They arose from 18th-19th century hillbilly and farming communities across the South. This is why so many church planting efforts from the SBC have been such spectacular failures up North, except among those who used to live in the South.

So I have the same problem: in order to become a Christian one has to change from a 21st century person into someone who likes old-timey stuff and white gospel music, along the lines of "O Brother Where Art Thou." (believe it or not, gospel used to be the "pop" music of the 40s and 50s!). Again, it's perpetuating a culture that wasn't even that good to begin with, but old habits die hard. So many things in traditional churches are sacred cows, but they weren't even invented until 1700 years or more after Jesus died! So why is it sacrosanct if it's not even in the Bible? Things such as pews, pianos, organs, steeples, those stupid little Lord's Supper crackers, Gaither music, wearing suits to church, Sunday School (an 18th cent. invention!!), most hymns, titles such as Reverend, talking to God in Shakespearean English, and so on. (although they do get baptism right!)

Also, most of these style churches have ZERO baptisms/year because they are made up of curmudgeonly old people who hate young people, hate lost people, and hate each other, and they especially hate change!

So basically, because I am not a hillbilly farmer from the post-civil war South, they have nothing to offer me (except the awesome fried chicken pot lucks), and they don't want anything that I have to offer....

That is, until I show my skills in men's gospel quartet singing!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i see where you're coming from, but this one may be a little harsh lol. some of those old timey churches in the south fit right in with their communities. also, many haven't had an educated pastor in decades (if ever), & they really don't know how to reach out. on the positive, if it weren't for those little churches across the bible belt, namb & the imb would collapse. but, i see where you're coming from, having been baptized & "called" in those types of churches. many have lost their way & equate churchianity with some gospel form of hee-haw.