The Miracle Worker

In reading through Matthew with our church, we have seen that miracles were a very important part in confirming the truth of Jesus' messiah-ship.

No problems there...Jesus did miracles. He was/is God. That's what gods do. How did they work? What were the mechanics of healings/feedings/exorcisms? I have no idea, but that's OK, because I'm not God.

The problem springs up around chapter 10, where Jesus gives his apostles "authority" (or jurisdiction/power) to do the same things He did. What now??

OK, so we've got some humans doing miracles now to validate the heralding of the new covenant. But these guys are Jesus' hand-picked apostles, so they're way up there, as far as humans go.

To further complicate things, Paul writes about gifts of the Holy Spirit given to every believer to build up the body, some of whom are able to heal and other miraculous things.

This is a huge problem, because 1) where are they? and 2) who are they? My mind immediately goes to faith healers like Benny Hinn: big time showboating jerks who use miracles to make money. Are they for real? I suppose it's possible, but not very likely.

So where are they? Did miraculous gifts just quit after the first century? Paul seems to indicate that spiritual gifts will keep going until Jesus returns and we don't need them. The Bible never hints that some gifts will keep going and others will stop (despite what John MacArthur says).

Interestingly, most of the reports of miracles come from the mission field, where people know next to nothing about Jesus. In fact, one of the professors at my Alma Mater seminary was involved in a miracle healing around Muslims in Israel.

My preliminary opinion about miracles in America is that Americans are so "educated" and skeptical that they would not believe a real miracle if they saw it, so why should God work here where it won't pay off?

Then again, Christianity has a lot to prove among people who see it as merely an ideology and ethical system, rather than following the God of the Universe.

I myself have seen some pretty amazing "coincidences" that I would fall just short of calling miracles. Yet I find myself longing to see God REALLY work in America: not just in broad ideas, successful fundraisers, and easily answered prayers, but in actual blind-seeing/deaf-hearing/dead-raising/demon-throwing miracles.

So, does anyone out there have any real miracle stories? "I Want to Believe..."

(Two) Too Many Resurrections

I found this link doing some browsing on some alleged correspondance between Horus and Osiris and Jesus. As suspected, many Wikipedia-types are just making crap up with no basis at all.

My favorite is how people claim both Horus and Jesus were baptized at age thirty, but the only story that comes close is when Horus is eaten by an alligator!! I have a hard time calling that a parallel.

The link is a little long, sorry, but it's really interesting (to me, at least).

http://tektonics.org/copycat/osy.html

I am so sad for all the people who have been duped by stuff that is entirely fabricated out of nothing.

Riding the Karma Train

I have been renting episodes of "My Name Is Earl" from Blockbuster Online, and I have absolutely fallen in love with the show. I know, it's no "Office," but they are two completely different types of comedy.

Anyhow, the show's premise is all about Karma--do bad things, and bad things happen, and vice versa. The main character is trying to make up for all of the bad things he's done by helping and repaying the people he's wronged over the years.

It sounds great....at first. Honestly, I find myself wishing that life worked exactly like this. There are several problems, though. First, I find it interesting that in the show, every time Earl finds a way to cross something off his list of wrongs, he almost always wrongs someone in the process, thus, adding to his list. Basically, the list will never come to an end. Hmmm. So then, what happens when someone finishes life with an unfinished list of bad karma????

To be brief, the Bible teaches that there is a connection with sin and righteousness and consequences, but not an absolute connection, because A) no one is completely righteous and B) no one is completely sinful. Generally, everyone pays the consequences for their behaviors at some point of life.

Karma has yet to find a way to explain death and why good things happen to bad people, and the other way around. Why do all humans want to strive and think of themselves as "good" in some form, but everyone understands that they are not perfect. Something is wrong....we know that right exists....what's going on here?

Christianity can say that God's grace coexists with mankind's fallenness, and their interactions are sometimes mysterious to us. Why does God heal, feed, and bless people who will never acknowledge these things as coming from Him? Why do Christians experience pain and suffering?

Karma?

It's just not that easy....

Too Many Resurrections

I was reading a book on Ancient mythology the other day, and I noticed something: there are a lot of ancient myths from the Near/Middle East that involve the death and resurrection of a god, usually celebrated in early spring (sound familiar?).

I have heard of some of these before, such as Baal, Adonis, Osiris, Mithras, Hercules, but I found that the list goes on and on (Wikipedia listed about 30!). It would appear on first glance that Jesus is just one in a long line of myths with a recycled story line and a different nationality.

But wait...not quite...

Interestingly, all the ancient myths before Jesus, involve a PAIR of deities, usually a consort. Baal is rescued by Asherah, Osiris by Isis, Persephone has several rescuers and lovers, and every myth is riddled with countless variations of characters, actions, and timeframes. But, generally speaking, a deity dies, the lover mourns/prays/searches, and the dead deity is reborn.

Jesus doesn't fit this pattern, not surprisingly, because of the lack of consort deities in a monotheistic system. I find it fascinating that Mary Magdelene becomes the consort/rescuer, in a sense, of later Jesus myth traditions put forth by Gnostics and other groups who stole Jesus to make up their own stories. Looks like those guys are the ones who are guilty of several counts of plagiarism...

My point in all this meandering is that despite what comparative religion professors may claim, Jesus is not just one of many dying and rising gods. His story doesn't fit any of the details of the other stories, except for coming back from the dead. Some may claim a parallel with Hercules's three day trip to Hades, but guess what, Jesus never went to Hell...it ain't in the Bible!

Hope this helps somebody.

A Personality Test for Jesus

Was Jesus right-brained or left-brained? What a weird question to ask, but it's the thing that keeps me awake at nights. I think most preachers paint him as a left-brained, type-A, person, while music leaders, picture him as the opposite (of course their are exceptions).

For myself, I wonder. Isn't it interesting how much of ourselves we constantly put into Jesus. Think of all those blonde-haired, blue-eyed Jesuses in so many paintings. Or why do people get so irate over the "black Jesus" of Jeremiah Wright?

This all goes back to making gods in OUR image, and Buddhists and Atheists are eating this stuff up! So many people are so guilty of over-teaching the attributes of God/Jesus/Spirit.

For example, JW's say, "God is love, so He wouldn't send people to an eternal Hell." Pacifists say, "God is peace, so all violence is sinful and rebellious." Shouldn't we instead let the Bible tell us and inform us what God means by "love" and "peace"? That is, the WHOLE Bible.

God is not bi-polar, and He does not contradict himself. He does not fit our boxes and categories. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be surprised by what I see when I meet Him, so I'll try to put the brakes on breaking the second commandment in idea form.

Christians, Military, War, and Stuff

Let me get this out of the way first: ideally, I'm a pacifist. I've never been in a fist fight. I've never been in an offensive military vehicle. I was in the Air Force for four years as a plane mechanic and I got out because I had a hard time being a part of an organization whose job it was to cause death and injury. It's not easy to live with that.

Having said all that now, I have to say that I think a government military is very necessary. We live in a fallen world where fallen people come to power in fallen countries and make dangerous decisions that affect the lives of hundreds, thousands, and millions of people.

Sometimes diplomacy just does not work. A good example of that is WWII. Countries tried to work with Hitler's Germany, compromise with him, and he just did what he wanted because he could. The only recourse was a military response to his military aggression.

I can't say that I really agree with the fiasco that led us into the war with Iraq after 9/11. But, one of the things that comforts me is that we know there was massive oppression and even genocide going on in the North. This war helped to stop that.

Now, about Christians and war. Several things: "Just War Theory" is not in the Bible. It comes from Augustine. There are no guidelines in the Bible for going to war (except for against Canaanites). But there are a few important verses to help our understanding here.

Rom 13--God has given government "the sword," which is technically and literally the sword of execution, but I think this could easily be expanded to national defense. The government has the God-given right to defend its citizens.

Luke 3:14--when John the Baptist was asked by a soldier what to do to live a righteous life, John's answer (which was probably the right one) was that he should not oppress and be content with his wages. Nothing about killing people? Hmmm.....

The bottom line is this: war is horrible and vile and evil. But oppression, genocide, and injustice are also horrible and vile and evil and sinful. I cannot sit by and just "pray for them."

"Christian" Economy

While I alluded to this in my last post, I wanted to deal a little more fully with politics and economics from a Christian perspective. First point: God did not invent the free-market political system. It's not in the Bible, and there seem to be several things against this in the Bible.

BUT--while the Bible seems to advocate a form of socialism, we must remember that it had God as its beginning, middle, and end. In modern forms of socialism, religion is viewed as unnecessary and even harmful to the process. In short, socialism does not work with the separation of church and state.

Further, if you look at the Old Testament, the ideal was a loose confederation of tribes, all following God, and the evil was a more and more concentrated form of monarchy--i.e., bigger government, with Solomon the chief offender putting his subjects to forced labor and high taxes.

I think it just has to come down to preference. There is a time and place for everything, and God is still even in control of the worst and most oppressive governments. Their times will end, and God will emerge victorious.

As to the Free Market, I personally like it. I like choosing between Wal-Mart and small businesses. I personally like Reagan's policies of cutting taxes and government and letting people do their best, and be rewarded, not punished (more heavily taxed), for success. It seemed to work great in the 80's by turning the nation's highest unemployment and interest rates into the nation's greatest and longest time of prosperity during peacetime. History speaks for itself.

Reagardless of which president takes office next January, God is still in control. It's a comfort (though small) to know that in Jesus' time the tax rate was around 80%. Roman government had an enormous welfare program. Early Christians faced a horrendously unfair court system. We have it pretty good here. God will still love us and be with us, just like He was with us during the Carter and Clinton years. We seriously do not deserve the prosperity we have enjoyed over the years. It's a blessing--not a right.

Plus, it's kind of hard to ask God for wealth. Jesus didn't, and he didn't teach us to do that. He taught us to ask for what we need to get by.

That being said, I'm still not gonna vote for someone to kill the free market with higher taxes and insane amounts of government spending.

George Bush may be stupid, but I'm paying a lot less taxes now than I was before Clinton left office, not to mention sizable rebate checks two different times...just something to think about.

Coming next, Christians, government, and military.

Politics and Life

As we're coming to the close of this oppressively long political season, I've been struggling to reconcile my religious views with my political ones. Certain religious thinkers, especially lately, have been espousing the idea that the purpose of Christianity is bring about God's Kingdom on earth, politically, environmentally, relationally, and so on.

The problem is that Jesus didn't really espouse a political system in the sermon on the mount. Some of the teachings sound close to communist system (toward which many democratic politicians lean): that is, giving to the poor whenever they ask, non-retaliation/peace, and an aversion to power and greed. This makes the republican party and their rich "cronies" look anti-Christian.

However, before we vote to crush the free-market, we must seriously examine a few things. In the Bible, God is the one who exalts the humble and humbles the powerful--in socialism, the government takes that job away from God, and in essence, becomes the god of its citizenry, by ensuring the health, prosperity, defense, unity, and personhood of its subjects.

Personhood? Yup. My biggest fear of the democratic party comes from their assault against the sanctity of human life: abortion, euthanasia, eugenics, cloning, stem cell harvesting, etc. We're very close to going down the same path as 20th century Germany in claiming that certain modes of life are not worth living. When we start getting rid of the old and weak, we are but one step away from mandatory abortions for special needs children (some health care plans already do this!!), mandatory assisted suicides for terminal diseases, and then comes genocide.

Alright, call me alarmist and crazy.

The thing that endears me most to Gov. Sarah Palin (you becha!) is her fierce insistence on treating all human life as worthy of dignity and respect. Early Christianity had a strong reputation for this, as well, most notably in rescuing discarded babies from trash piles, which was the ancient form of abortion.

While I can't wholeheartedly endorse every Republican candidate, this issue is a serious deal-breaker for me. It's not about devaluing women in any way, it's about the government protecting every citizen's right to life, even--especially even--when that citizen cannot speak for his/herself.

Why not?

This is just kind of a passing fancy, just to see if I can do it, but I have been thinking about trying to just eat vegetarian for one week. I'm not sure I can even make it a day, but there will surely be no harm in trying it.

I was originally thinking about going for one month, but that's kind of ridiculous. I'll probably keep dairy in there. I'm not going to go all vegan or anything.

It's mostly just curiosity. I haven't picked when I'm going to start yet. Who knows, I may just end up not even doing it.

I guess I put this in my blog just to see if anyone had any thoughts or suggestions, you know, like vegetables that actually taste good and stuff....

We'll see.

The Checklist of Sin...

What's on your "Sins Checklist"?

I know it seems like an odd question, but the thing is, most of the behaviors we know as "sin" are not even covered in the Bible. And some that are, are not the things we make them. I'll give you some examples:

1) Saying cuss words
2) Smoking/dipping tobacco
3) Drinking Alcohol (as in not to drunkenness and debauchery and belligerency)
4) Listening to loud rock/rap music

The problem with evaluating people by these (or whatever) criteria is that oftentimes we often treat people much differently based on whatever category we put them in: Sinner/Saint/Whatever. Hidden in these categories are often feelings of superiority or even disdain, or maybe that's just me.

Anyway, I don't really know you, so I don't know if this applies to you at all. But I was just thinking that God maybe doesn't care so much about the things that top our sin list. I wonder what God's list looks like, and which boxes I can check off. Probably none, really if God gets to define them. He has a way of perfection that I hate comparing myself with because I end up looking like a pretty big dirtbag compared to Jesus.

I wonder what it was like to be around a perfect guy. What would it be like to get a compliment from a perfect human, like about big faith, or whatever.

Have you ever noticed Jesus' categories of sinful people? "Hypocrits and Little-Faith-ers." The first century Jews had "tax collectors and prostitutes." The Roman aristocracy had "barbarians and slaves." My personal top two were/are "fornicators and idiots." In the past in America there were "hippies and communists." So what are your categories of sinners? I bet whatever they are, they conveniently leave you out.

I think I tend to be more of a "ye of little faith" than anything else.

Why I Like House Church (50th POST!)

For most of you reading this, you know I really don't have a particular fondness for traditional styles of church. I have been gathering with a home-based church group for several months now and I have just fallen in love with it. I just wanted to take a little time to explain why I love it so much.

1) Eating together every week. While this may sound trivial to some, my primary love language (from Gary Chapman's Five Love Languages) is Quality Time. I rarely got to spend any quality time with people in traditional/contemporary churches. With house church, I get my fix every week, at least.

2) Input in teaching. I'll just say this: in every other single Sunday School class I have been a part of, almost nobody took my inputs/suggestions seriously, except when I was teaching (which was rarely). I'm not sure why. Yet with an open Bible study, everyone has a chance to ask questions, give input, relate to current struggles, apply to life, and so on. My input is valuable, and I get the chance to value input from others.

3) Prayer. This is the crown jewel of the house church movement as far as I'm concerned. In our group, at the end of the Bible time, we all pray for one another every week. When someone prays for you in your presence, it is the most amazing feeling in the world. When a Sunday School teacher prays for you--it feels cold and forced. When a friend prays for you who doesn't have to, it is the most affirming thing ever. I rarely got this at church (for one thing I didn't feel comfortable enough to share requests) and I get it every week at house church. Plus, I think it's in the Bible somewhere.

4) Sleeping in on Sunday. Since our group just has one long meeting per week (and not three short ones) we just have it on Sunday nights, and Sunday mornings are free---and they are AWESOME!! I really don't see why churches try to have Sunday School, AND Service, AND Discipleship Classes, AND Second Service all in one day. Who can keep track of all that? No wonder the best Christians are educated beyond their obedience---they don't have time to obey because they're spending so much time in inneffective Bible studies.
Bottom line: I feel physically refreshed from resting, and spiritually refreshed from the evening's activities with zero compromises. Win-win-win.

I know there are "traditional" churches out there that incorporate these elements into their routine and they are much better off because of it.

For me, going to church is like eating vegetables. It's something that really isn't fun, but you do it anyone because either someone makes you, or think it's good for you. House church is like finding out that there is ice cream and soda that keeps you healthier than vegetables. Only God could do something like that. It's just too bad He doesn't do that with real ice cream and soda.

Mark, Discipleship, and so forth.

I just finished plowing my way through Mark for my "quiet time" ritual, and I thought I'd share some of that, since my last few posts have been just complaints (I'm practicing for Rush Limbaugh's job!).

Clearly, one of Mark's distinctives is his emphasis on the path of discipleship. His gospel takes Jesus from baptism (the beginning of discipleship) through resurrection, and leaves the ending wide open. Another distinctive is that Jesus doesn't do a whole lot of talking, or "teaching." He lets his actions do the talking. In this sense, it's a little difficult to get to know Jesus by reading Mark. And this sense of mystery is definitely present to all the characters in the story, who basically have no idea what is going on--even up to the ladies who discover the empty tomb in 16:8.

I can totally relate to this. For most of my life, I'll admit, this whole Jesus business has been hard to figure out. I'm to the point now where I kind of resent people who appear to have all the answers, especially when they're arrogant about it.

Why is it that I've never been able to "hear" from God during a quiet time? How come my Bible study time never seems to have any relevance to what I'm going through in life? What the heck does Jesus mean in all of his last days teachings? Why is it so difficult to sustain a prayer to God? If the disciples couldn't get Jesus talking to him face to face, what on earth chance do I have when I'm just alone with my thoughts?

And I know I'm not alone in these questions, especially among seminary students.

Maybe the "personal" discipleship and contemporary methods (spiritual disciplines) are what's out of whack. You know, when there is only one verse in the New Testament that remotely supports a daily personal quiet time (or does it?), I kind of wonder if the reason my quiet times don't work is because they're not even God's pattern to begin with?????

More to come......

(spoiler alert: it takes a village to raise a Christian)

Blech

Moving is no fun!

So now the wife and me are in a new place with a little breathing room (finally!). Although, the living room is a stupid "L" shape that is impossible to design around with our furniture. Not only that, but the finished basement, while big, has narrow stairs that almost no furniture can go down, so our hands are really tied, decorationally speaking. Oh well.

I don't know if anyone can relate, but I really, REALLY hate applying for jobs. The work is so tedious and most of the time you don't even get the job.

As of a week or two ago, I've decided to officially put any church ambitions on an indefinite hold. I'm just kind of sick of pushing against God all the time. It's frustrating when every point on the compass is the wrong direction!

So here I am, clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right. So, I'm just wondering if I'm completely stuck for the rest of my life in a job that I hate, living totally unfulfilled, and letting all my talent go to waste. Maybe I don't even have talent? I just want the feeling that I'm making a difference somewhere. Is that wrong?

Will there ever be a rainbow?

Potpourri

As some of you can imagine, I'm not really happy working at UPS. I've been looking for a supplemental job for awhile now, and I may have something here. Over the weekend, I interviewed for a job with T-Mobile. The great thing is, it sounds like this could be more than a supplemental income job, but a real job for awhile that could take the place of UPS and allow me to make a livable wage, finally!! So pray for me as the process continues.

Thanks to God's provision, we were able to pay off over $14,000 of credit card debt across four cards in just over three years, even while going to school. I'm really hoping that this will be the time in our lives that puts us ahead, financially. It's really great to have that monkey off our back.

And now for something completely different....
In my interview yesterday, I had to explain what I was doing with my degree(s) and what my goals were. It's difficult enough explaining "house church" (a better term is organic church) to someone who's a theologically trained pastor, but to a non-Christian all I could think about is that it came across like I was a cult member!

In other news, this Saturday is the big day: moving day. So much happening, new living space, new job (possibly), new phase in life, and please pray that we can get something going in our area by way of home Bible studies or something.

The only thing on my horizon is everything.

Humble "Innovation"

Because of anti-traditional diatribes of late, I have been questioned by several people vis-a-vis what happens when my anti-traditions become tradition.

First, I want to make clear that none of my ideas are innovations. In fact, most of them even predate Jesus (e.g., Socratic method style teaching).

Second, I have no love whatsoever for chasing fads, or the next new thing. Part of the problem with institutionalized churches (e.g. Willow Creek, Saddleback) that hold conference after conference promoting new, bigger, better, faster, whatever, is that they eat up huge chunks of budget on surface stuff. I am dealing with a foundational understanding of what the church is.

Third, I have to realize that not everyone will agree with me now or ever. The problem with more traditional churches is that they don't care and will not listen to younger people. When I was in high school, the pastor of my church was retirement-age and I loved him (still do!). Why? Because he treated me as a valued person and took time to talk with me and get to know me and pray for me. That's all I'm really looking for: acceptance, the ability to be myself without being judged or relegated to being a second-class Christian.

In summary, I'm not looking for something new, per se, I'm looking for something real, authentic, meaningful, and worthwhile.

I find it funny that even the "liberal" churches are having the same problems with their young people. It's not about mere rebellion, or taste, or style, or preference. It's about humbling yourself, being open to dialogue with your "enemies," and dropping the need to always be right.

I can now guarantee you that I have been wrong on some of my blogs. It's OK with me.

It takes a big man to admit his mistakes, and I am that big man. I've just got to go out there, stand up for what I believe in, and do the best I can do. I'm not the pope, I'm not Jesus, but I see a broken system in American church discipleship. I can't just stand by and ignore it. Something's got to change. If I'm suggesting the wrong things, let's talk about it and see where we end up.

I am sure of a few things: inform people why you do what you do, don't blow smoke and make up crap that sounds good but isn't really in the Bible, and treat people like they are valuable until they actually become valuable.

Life in the Desert

This past Sunday I preached a sermon at Set Free about "Life in the Desert," essentially explaining how to cope with times of difficulty and spiritual frustration and the feeling that God is very distant. If you've read my past few blogs, I'm sure you can see how appropriate that is for my season of life.

So for those of you who feel like you're wandering around in circles, getting nowhere, and "chasing the wind," I'll give you the abbreviated version of my sermon (which clocked in at a cool 25 minutes!)

First, times in the desert are a necessity. Every person has gone, or will go, through these times. All the big shots in the Bible went through it: Moses, Elijah, Jesus, Paul, and even some littler shots like Philip the evangelist. There are many different reasons people have to go through the desert: tempting, testing, punishment, a personal God-encounter, escape, training, and to minister to other desert dwellers. The key is to endure the time, while not doing anything to keep you there longer.

Second, in the desert, regardless of why you are there, you will face temptation. Either the temptation to "go back to Egypt," or the temptation to stay and do things like God's not watching. Our reactions to these can either be like the Israelites in the desert, who grumbled, complained, and rebelled. Or you can react like Jesus, who stood up and faced his temptation by quoting some basic commands of scripture to his adversary.

Third, it is important to keep the focus on God's provision during desert times, because this is where the biggest miracles happen. Yet these big miracles are often not a daily occurrance; it is, rather, the one-day-at-a-time provision direct from the hand of God. When you start to focus on what you don't have, you are on your way to failure. The keys are to keep praying for everything you need, regardless of what it is, and to be thankful for what you get.

Finally, the result of the successful navigation of the desert times is abundant blessing--the promised land! Unfortunately, these blessings can take many forms, which may make them hard to recognize. Ultimately, our entire life on earth could probably be classified as a desert existence, meeting with various oases between the drier times. So any blessings we get down here are only a transitory foreshadowing of the glorious riches that God has in store for us through the provision of Jesus Christ.

So there you have it. And if you're currently in the desert, I find that ice cream really helps take the edge off!

Experience?

I wrote this awhile ago, but got too mad in the middle and had to delete it. I'll try this again, now, with a little self-restraint.

Every now and then I search through the pastor search websites, just because I still need a job with a livable wage, and over and over I see that churches almost unanimously require five years of senior pastor experience.

This is a problem for several reasons:
1) most importantly, it excludes talented people (i.e., me) from the job pool just because I chose secular employment to put me through school.
2) it FORCES mobility on a profession that needs more steadiness. It breeds church-hopping pastors, always looking for the greener grass, never staying long enough to work through problems. A pastor cannot truly become a part of a community after just five years. And I would almost bet that high mobility has created a lot of the problems in pastor's lives, like divorce, burn out, and family resentment (or at least added to it).
3) it's not based on anything! Call me crazy, but I've seen that phrase so many times that I'm completely sure it is just mindless parroting of something, just because it sounds good. Show me the Barna report that says pastors with five-years experience always succeed when they transplant churches. Oh right, it doesn't exist.
4) to me, that requirement just says, "our church is too good to allow a pastor to make some mistakes." You know, in my church, I'll be happy to let everyone make as many mistakes as I make, if not more. We're none of us perfect, except big churches.

OK, well, I'm getting all riled up again, so I'd better quit.

Here's the moral: Churches, don't limit your pool of candidates by placing meaningless regulations on potential pastors. How about more meaningful ones, like "must like urban/suburban/rural environments," or "must love hard-headed people."

I'm just glad my wife didn't require five years of dating experience before we went out! Sometimes, God can make up for a lot!
--Abraham didn't need five years of parenting experience
--David didn't need five years of king experience
--Jeremiah didn't need five years of prophet experience
--Paul didn't need five years of Scripture-writing experience
--Jesus didn't need five years of messiah experience

Many times, life experiences can prepare us for the bigger roles God has for us.

Value

I was just reading "Blue Like Jazz" by Donald Miller (again!) and there was something in there about letting things or people "name" you. That is, making your entire worth come from one person or something.

It became clear to me that I have let my vision of the future "name" me. I had decided that I would have no value to anyone unless I planted a successful church in Northern Virginia. That's really what these last few weeks have been about: my feelings of complete worthlessness because this did not happen. Somehow, in the midst of all this I forgot that God values me more than I can value anything: more than my wife, family, job, hobbies, or even my guitars!

The thing that has been the most meaningful about these past few days/weeks is so many friends just coming out of the woodwork and bending over backwards to make time for me, to listen to my frustrations, and show me that they are for me even when circumstances are not.

I've regained some optimism about the future. I'm looking for houses out here, and the prospect of having a real house for the first time with my wife is exciting. We'll see. If you read this, keep praying for me. And read "Blue Like Jazz"!

A Confession

It's amazing to me that much of my haranguing of the "traditional church" stems from petty jealousy. Why don't I have a big church (or A church) like those other idiots?

Which idiots, you ask?
--Joel Osteen has the largest church in America and you're lucky to hear a reference to the Bible (much less Jesus) in one of his sermons.
--Then there was that guy in Colorado who had a mega church, was president of the Evangelicals, but got caught doing meth with a gay prostitute.
--Also my wife had a friend whose husband had several church jobs and a touring band, but he decided to turn his back on his career, his wife, and his five kids for some floozy he met at seminary of all places.

So why do these guys get the good gigs, while people like me, who have no idea where to even buy crystal methamphetamine, or who talk a lot about Jesus in sermons, struggle to find a gig with more than twenty people? Do you see what I am doing here? I'm masking my sins behind their "bigger" sins and claiming something to the effect that God doesn't need to use as much grace with me as He does with others. So, basically, I'm making it easier on God; He gets the better end of the deal, right? Right? Yeah, I guess not.

What I really hate is hearing people with big (150+) churches talking about how miserable they are sometimes! If you hate it so much, then why don't you step down and let some of the rest of us have a turn?!? I really used to think that pastors weren't in it for themselves, but lately I've seen so many who are absolutely intent on plastering their own pretty face and their brilliance all over the place. When I was in high school, we called these kind of people "attention whores." I wonder what John the Baptist meant when he said "he must increase and I must decrease." I like the kind of pastors who hate the spotlight and hate the sound of their own voice, but these guys don't have mega churches, they instead force their way into email inboxes through their own soapbox blogs, like me!

It's so easy to have that cheese ball humility amid success; I should know, I've been successful at various times. The difficult thing is to live with humility that comes from trial and failure. When life humiliates you, that is a whole different ball of cheese; plus it isn't so offensive to others I've found.

People like to say that when God closes a door, He opens a window. What they fail to reveal is that the window is usually on the second or third floor with really pointy bushes below you, and the window is really small and uncomfortable to squeeze through, and once you're outside, you really wonder whether or not you should have stayed inside and waited just a little while longer for another door to open, but in reality we all want what we can't have, and just when we get it we start wanting something else that we can't have and just start blaming God for the fact that life isn't perfect, but if life were perfect how would we know we needed God??

Or maybe that's just me....

Change of Plans

There was a commercial a while ago about some company (maybe Nextel??) that allowed people to be flexible when the situation changed. And even though I don't remember exactly what the commercial was advertising, I remember that everybody in these commercials said "Change of plans" about 100 times. It got pretty irritating.

Anyway, as I follow Jesus, that seems to be the theme of my life:

Career in music? Change of plans --> enlist in Air Force
Career in Air Force? Change of plans --> go to school for ministry
Useful college degree? Change of plans --> quick degree in "General Studies"
Get paid experience in ministry? Change of plans --> stay in UPS
Career as a regular pastor? Change of plans --> pursue church planting
Plant a church in Virginia? Change of plans --> get financially settled first
Move to Virginia? Change of plans --> stay in Kansas City
Do more with UPS???
Find a house to rent in KC???
Get a second job???
Start a church???
Go to another church???

Well, because of all these changes, I have almost been a nomad. My only dream in life is to go somewhere and STAY THERE! But God keeps churning my life around, with experience after experience that leaves me dissatisfied.

And the worst thing about it is that I don't really have anything solid to complain about. I can't relate to any of the psalms or Job because my only real enemies are my attitude and God's roadblocks and detours (probably related?). I definitely identify more with Ecclesiastes in being stuck in the futility of life in the cycles of the generations.

In the midst of all this I am faced with the exasperating exhortations in Scripture that just tell me to be faithful and shun evil and so on. I want to find some real practical help in making my daily decisions and know that I am on the right track, but I keep coming back to just being a good student/follower of Jesus.

There is one metaphor in Psalms that really applies to me here: "stuck in the miry clay." The hardest part about all of this is resisting the temptation to entice God: "God I'll fast/give/study/share/love/sell whatever if You'll just..." Sometimes I really wish God worked that way; that would make this Christianity stuff a whole heck of a lot easier than what it really is: waiting patiently for the Lord to lift us up out of the mire in due time.

Something Nice

Just so I'm not misunderstood, here's my definition of "traditional" church:

A church whose mission focus and front door is the Sunday Worship service, with the service's main focus being the sermon, and whose supplemental programs focus almost exclusively on classroom learning.

According to this definition, most "contemporary" churches are the same as traditional ones, just with different instruments.

I've been challenged by several parties to say something nice about them. Here goes: they did a great job teaching a lot of people music. Almost all of the best musicians come from this church background (i.e., me) even if they don't stay there (i.e., me).

But the problems I hope to overcome are:
1) they are audience-focused, not God-focused, you couldn't meet God if you tried.
2) the services depend on a completely passive audience (yes, they do!)
3) since there is no time to connect, people never see the "real people" there, just superficial masks that add to a huge hypocrisy problem
4) only a handful of people "do ministry" on a weekly basis, and only because they are paid!

And I will also say this:
the traditional/contemporary church taught me that these four things are indeed problems, but these churches just don't realize that the format is what causes the problems, not necessarily the incredibly sinful people that don't listen.

We need to ask these questions now:
1) How can I teach in a way that leads people to God?
2) How can I encourage participatory learning?
3) What do I do to provide time for busy people to really connect with each other?
4) How can I let more and more people minister to each other (entertainment doesn't count!)?

The short answer is to make churches less like a night at the symphony and more like an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. One changes broken lives, the other is an excuse to play dress-up and schmooze with people you don't even like. Which one is your church?

Messianic Postmodernity

This post may go over some people's heads, but I'm OK with that.

I'm really excited to be graduated so that now I can finally read all the books I've been wanting to read but couldn't because of the demands of school. I'm reading more about the "emergent" wing of the emerging church, frequently classified as those who reside in emergentvillage.com.

One of their unifying traits (if any!) is the idea of what has been termed a "trajectory hermeneutic." Simply put, that is the idea that there seems to be a shift between old and new testaments, and the church continues the shift as our context changes. Some might call it evolutionary Christianity, some might call it stupid.

Some are claiming that we are in a new stage in God's redemption story, which included past things like creation, the exodus, the exile, Jesus' resurrection, (perhaps) the protestant reformation, and now postmodernism (or postmodernity?).

Here's the key question: is the Bible sufficient after 2,000 to 3,000 years of saying the same thing? Are the people that propound this view really under the direction of the Holy Spirit?

I'll make this brief: Yes with a but, and no with an if.
Yes, scripture is sufficient, otherwise we'd either get more of it or we wouldn't even need it.
While I believe that many of these people are Christian, (probably?) I think that some of their teachings are going to have serious consequences down the line.

"Present Future"

I just finished reading The Present Future by Reggie McNeal. It was a graduation present and a good read. He said a lot of the same things that I've been writing about, except his was more thought out and a few years before me!

Here's my deal. I want a church (group of people) to be different, not just for the sake of new, but for the sake of discipleship. As I've been saying we really need to reevaluate the marks of a follower of Jesus (traditionally: church attendance, tithing, and helping the church) and use marks from the sermon on the mount, such as loving enemies, generosity, genuineness, and a love for God because of Jesus that spills over into our other relationships.

Basically, I really don't see much good in the institutional church. My goal is to massively decentralize things, and "disorganize" the church, if you will, in order to make it more effective and even more enjoyable in my opinion.


Anyhoo, I'm heading to VA today for a much deserved vacation and to see if I can't persuade someone to hire me. Maybe I can even find a dude or two who wants to help me start a church.
God only knows......

Iron Sharpens Iron

There is a Proverb from the book of Proverbs in the Bible that says, "iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another." This verse is generally used for men's fellowships and whatnot, but I think the scope is a little more general. That is, the process of maturing happens on the forge of relationships, interactions, and communication.

Spiritual maturity cannot happen as a monk, unless that monk is with a group of other monks. The key is not inside ourselves, it is outside ourselves, sourced in the God-man Jesus, and actualized among both his followers and the rest of the world.

Unlike some people would have us believe, Christian discipleship is a relatively quick and easy process. If we take most of the apostles (including Paul) as an example, the path to spiritual maturity can take about three years, give or take.

Don't get me wrong, there are aspects of the discipleship process that will never be complete as long as we live. It is what many theologians see as the tension of living life in both the "already complete" and the "not yet complete."

Jesus provides us with the already part, and other people help us along the not yet plane. Sometimes the "process-oriented" people emphasize the distinctions in the process to such an extent that we can develop classes of Christians.

I like how Jesus made clear that even the least of the least Christian is greater than John the Baptist, as far as God is concerned. We can get so caught up with rank and file issues that we forget that every role is essential. We need others if we are going to be sharpened, whether that sharpening comes from the young or the super old.

Sorry, but the only rank in Christianity belongs to Jesus.

Finally!!

Well, I've got everything done (I think!) for graduation. The only thing left is to sign a few out-processing documents and walk the aisle in my festal garments.

I've been thinking about the discipleship process and church and blah-dee-blah-da-blooblooo, and I think I've come up with something. I think it's kind of cool, so I won't reveal it just yet (although I bet someone else somewhere has already come up with the stuff!).

I wanted to discuss some of the "purposes" of the church, and why I want to move beyond the purpose driven model. The church has one mission, and that is to make disciples, or build people to follow Jesus. Worship can be done anywhere, and if the church does its mission, it will glorify God. In fact, God is not glorified if the church's emphasis is just "worship time." The church's purpose is not fellowship, but fellowship serves the discipleship purpose. The same with ministry, ministry is not the church's purpose, but disciples will serve others based on the nature of our Teacher. Evangelism is not the purpose of the church, but is merely one part of the discipleship journey.

Discipleship would certainly be incomplete without these things, but they are merely aspects of Discipleship.

And discipleship is much more than education. Church should not be a laboratory, but should provide "on the job training" as its main teaching tool. Real learning and real growth happen in real life, not on some desert island away from the rabble of society.

More to come later.

The Leper Colony

I stole the title from a famous old movie called "12 o'clock High" starring Gregory Peck. It's an amazing movie on leadership and stuff and everyone should watch it.

Anyhow, this is not a commercial. There is a hot shot leader who thinks he is too good for everyone and doesn't respect Mr. Peck's authority. In response to this, the punk kid leader is put in charge of all the least-effective crew members on a plane named "The Leper Colony." The leader is told he has to make all these morons into the best unit or else risk dismissal.

Oddly enough, this is my dream, my quest, my mission, my goal. I would LOVE for my church to be a true Leper Colony, an Island of Misfit Toys, a League of Their Own, and soforth. In a way, I already have a glimpse of this working with Set Free, although I am not the pastor.

I'm sure that rich, successful people need Jesus just like everybody else, but that seems to be the only targets for church planting---after all, it worked pretty well for Rick Warren and Bill Hybels!

What if there were a group of idiots like me whose only goal in life was to avoid the trappings of the rich and powerful and successful? Who wanted to see a work that only God could do? Who wanted to move among the "lepers" of our day, as one of their own kind, and pull them to the only one who can cleanse them and make them new?

Well there just so happens to be one man foolish enough to go there, and his name is me!

Transparency

As I have been in different Sunday school classes in my career as a church attender, it seems like the hardest thing to do is to get people to answer questions, discuss their life, or whatever. One thing I have found that can reverse the trend is a little transparency.

The problem, however, is that inbred Christian churches (i.e., churches grow by the majority of transfer membership, and never affect the unchurched population) do not create an atmosphere conducive to transparency---that is, people are intimidated to talk about their mistakes.

Basically, it has to begin with the leadership. The pastor has to stop pretending to be perfect. In my opinion (and I know many will disagree with this), it begins by dressing like a normal person, even on Sunday!

We often don't realize it, but by trying to look nice, act happy, and appear holy on Sunday mornings, we are promoting the idea that God is sectioned off from the normal parts of our lives---we do things different at church from the way we do things at home, therefore, I have to dress up and act nice in order for God to accept me, and when I'm in dumpy clothes and and irritated, then God wants nothing to do with me.

The solution? Teachers, leaders, and others need to start freely admitting their failures, mistakes, sins, and start modeling a continuous lifestyle of repentance for the people they teach and lead and disciple. It means apologizing when you're wrong. It means using stories and illustrations about yourself where you are the villain and not the hero.

This is yet another reason why I love working for Set Free. There is zero pretension there. Even the pastor is a recovering alcoholic. Everybody there wears the same clothes they do during the week. And our Bible studies are amazing because nobody there is afraid of looking bad because we all already look bad.

I also recently learned that Charles Wesley used to kick people out of his church that dressed up too much. I may just continue that practice in my church!

Sit Down and Shut Up!!

I have really been thinking hard (aka wasting time) about coming up with a new purpose of the church. Basically, what I have seen is that churches want everyone but the pastor and song leader to just listen to them.

This is partially why I do so much music stuff in churches: A) I can't sit down or sit still long enough and B) I hate the music in most churches (but I already blogged about that!).

However people try to baptize it, church is basically just for the entertainment of the members. Sure, you sing along some times, but don't people even do that at music theaters and some movies?? Then, of course, there's the issue of taking the Lord's Supper out of all but four services a year. What's the point of even going to church? I don't do anything, there are better preachers and music on the radio, and the people are usually doing their own thing and cannot bring themselves to say anything more than "howya doin?" when they see you.

Both on paper and in practice, church needs to be a place where everybody does something, or has the opportunity to contribute something to the overall experience. This is one of the reasons that I am so enamoured with the house churches. I am still working on how to translate this into a larger setting. If it does translate into a larger setting, it may mean putting a heavier emphasis on small groups than on the "worship" service, which I am leaning toward calling a teaching service, because worship is more than an hour on Sunday: if worship is only for one hour a week, then it isn't worship!

What gets accomplished at church? If the church is just spinning wheels, no wonder so many people don't want to go!

Every member has something to offer, yet most do not have any idea what they can do for Jesus or for each other. And that's a problem. It might even be THE problem.

I'm Andrew Riley,
Good night, and good luck.

The Wrong Tuxedo

In speaking about all that's "wrong" with more traditional churches, I have had something playing in my mind over and over again.

There is a very memorable scene in the movie Dumb and Dumber (I like the TV version so all the bad stuff is cut out) where Jim Carey's character is trying on a series of tuxedos. He comes out in all these amazing, expensive, and fancy tuxedos and has just a horrible, uncomfortable look on his face.

Then, he finds a bright orange, hideously outdated tuxedo and top hat and just starts dancing around, happy as a puppy, while the salesmen are absolutely horrified.

That's me. Although other people like and respect all these other church forms, I am just miserable when I'm put in them. They may look good on me, but they feel so constricted and uncomfortable.

Yet, when I found this new tuxedo (the organic, emerging church), I immediately fell head over heals in love with it. It's what I was born to do!

So much more of the Bible makes sense in this context. I am now free to be creative and express the gifts that God gave me, and not pretend to be something I'm not. Evangelism flows from a love of God now, instead of some bully making me. My sermons get infused with passion when I talk about it! The world finally makes sense here.

I know that I may fall flat on my face and be an absolute failure at this endeavor to plant a church with virtually no support or financial backing. I don't care, because I've got Jesus, and that's got to count for something! Besides, I'll have a regular job, so I won't need the church's (or a mission organization's) money.

It all goes back to masculinity. I need risk. I need challenge. I need something that can only happen because of God. I just need to wear the tuxedo that fits. This is my quest.

"Certain death? Small chance of success? What are we waiting for?!" --Gimli, LOTR

Girly-Man Christians

I just finished "Why Men Hate Church" and I was in hearty agreement! Basically, church is for sissies, which is ironic, since almost all pastors and leaders are still "men." There is no challenge from the church (except to stop being mean and naughty?) and church is all about sitting still, being quiet, sharing emotions, and happy-clappy music (if you're LUCKY). Plus, the God of Christianity (Jesus) is portrayed as being a total wuss (a hippie in a dress).

I'm not going to say that the solution is to allow belligerance, disrespect, and casual sex into the church, but somebody needs to "man up" and say that it's OK to be Christian and masculine. How did Jesus, Paul, and David get turned into guys who drink tea while sitting on the couch and talking about their feelings?

As the great theologian and philosopher of this age, Sinbad, once eloquently said, "women be different from men!" Christianity should not be marked by either masculine or feminine traits, but should let the glory of God be reflected in different ways by the different sexes.

I'm sure there will be some debate on this, but men need manly examples of courage, vision, self-sacrifice, perseverance, leadership, how to treat women, all mixed with humility and reverance for God. While at the same time, women need womanly examples of sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows...

...of course I'm joking.

...they need examples of nurture, hospitality, relationship, sharing, empathy, mercy, and support, and coochie coo baby stuff, and and I'm sure their are many other things, but I'm not by any means the expert on women!! I'll let woment figure out what their femininity means, just as long as I still get to watch football.


I....braveheart....


I BRAVEHEART!!!! AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

So What's the Remedy?

In quick response to my last posts, I want to propose a solution to the "problems." My main problem is that the older forms of churches are out of touch with culture, but not in the good way. While being irrelevant to the sinful elements of culture is absolutely what the church is called to do, we are not commanded to just be relevant to older cultures. Missionaries have learned this and work with their people to produce biblically-faithful AND culturally relevant Christianity.

As far as music, I love a lot of hymns, but the music is awful!! I love how many musicians are putting old words to new music. Whenever I hear an old style hymn next to a modern song, it just clashes so horribly, like plaid and polka dot! You can keep the words, just modify the tune and chord structure. It may be fine for Martin Luther, but it makes me cringe.

As to culture, there are many innocent cultural forms, such as music, clothes (as long as they cover up all the naughty parts), hairstyles, architecture, furniture, technology, language, and so many other things! However, the church must always take a strong stand against things that are universally sinful, such as extramarital sex, homosexuality, lying, stealing, drunkenness, rage, hatred, oppression, greed, violence against women, rape, murder, abortion, child abuse, racism, injustice, idolatry, and I'm sure there are others that I forgot to mention.

Let me say about language that the church needs to ensure that she is understood. People need to know what they accept/reject. When was the last time you heard someone use the words exalt, holy, sanctification, repentance, propitiation, or blasphemy in regular speech outside the church? Yet all these words were very secular first century words that everybody knew and used. What if instead we said, honor, pure, purification, turning away, satisfaction, or slander?

Finally, does anyone really like to be lectured? Traditional churches often want you to attend around five church lectures per week. Give me a break! All churches need to put up or shut up! Quit talking about it and do it! People learn better by doing anyway! Jesus always balanced his teaching approach between listening and doing. Gee, maybe we should do that too.

OK, I'm done with my little rants. Hopefully I've hit some nerves and people will send me some nasty hate mail. It's OK, I can take it.

What's Wrong with Traditional Churches? Part 3

Finally, in my scathing assessments of what everybody else is messing up, I want to say a word about Seeker/Purpose Driven/Vineyard/Contemporary churches.

I find it a peculiar irony that these churches still call themselves "contemporary" when most of them are based on Baby Boomer sensibilities perfected in the 1960s-80s.

These churches are now falling into the temptation to perpetuate a dying culture, yet some are realizing that the morally-neutral aspects of church culture need to evolve in order to take Jesus the next generation.

I will say it again, the "morally-neutral" aspects should change. Music is absolutely morally-neutral, and if you disagree, then why are you not singing the Hebrew and Greek styles that the first century church used? There is nothing sinful about an electric guitar or drums.

My biggest problem with the "contemporary" church is, however, the music. Why do all the songs have to be in a gay, Elton John/hippie/happy-clappy style? And why are all the songs totally devoid of teaching and depth?

"You are worthy and wonderful" WHY?!?!?
"We love You, Lord" WHY?!?!!?
"We lift You up!" WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN????

I love what Mark Driscoll says about these churches, where Jesus is portrayed as a "gay, hippie in a dress" that you sing "prom songs" to. (I think he says that in each of his books and interviews but I took it from "Confessions of a Reformission Rev.")

Then, of course, there is the whole issue of the CEO-style leadership that all these churches have, and the desire to entertain seekers rather than follow Jesus. How did this get to be so popular?

What's Wrong with Traditional Churches? Part 2

Next in my series of "everybody's wrong but me" in church matters comes "What's wrong with traditional baptist-style churches.

Traditional Southern Baptist or Independent Baptist churches do not really have the same problems as say the traditional Lutheran or Anglican/Episcopalian churches. But a similar weakness exists.

They arose from 18th-19th century hillbilly and farming communities across the South. This is why so many church planting efforts from the SBC have been such spectacular failures up North, except among those who used to live in the South.

So I have the same problem: in order to become a Christian one has to change from a 21st century person into someone who likes old-timey stuff and white gospel music, along the lines of "O Brother Where Art Thou." (believe it or not, gospel used to be the "pop" music of the 40s and 50s!). Again, it's perpetuating a culture that wasn't even that good to begin with, but old habits die hard. So many things in traditional churches are sacred cows, but they weren't even invented until 1700 years or more after Jesus died! So why is it sacrosanct if it's not even in the Bible? Things such as pews, pianos, organs, steeples, those stupid little Lord's Supper crackers, Gaither music, wearing suits to church, Sunday School (an 18th cent. invention!!), most hymns, titles such as Reverend, talking to God in Shakespearean English, and so on. (although they do get baptism right!)

Also, most of these style churches have ZERO baptisms/year because they are made up of curmudgeonly old people who hate young people, hate lost people, and hate each other, and they especially hate change!

So basically, because I am not a hillbilly farmer from the post-civil war South, they have nothing to offer me (except the awesome fried chicken pot lucks), and they don't want anything that I have to offer....

That is, until I show my skills in men's gospel quartet singing!

What's Wrong with Traditional Churches? Part 1

I was just asked by a Christian friend today, "what's wrong with traditional churches?" Seeing as that's kind of a loaded question, I'll try to tread lightly here.

First of all, let me say that every church is different, and what I'm about to say does not apply to every church, so if it doesn't apply, don't be offended.

The main problem I have with the traditional church is that it arose out of a culture that really doesn't exist anymore, that is, Victorian/Colonial western society. Believe it or not, traditional churches were VERY culturally relevant in times past, but it was and is VERY different from the first century church. (First Cent. church had no building, no staff, no instruments, and had no connections to government, but used grassroots efforts to change their world).

The Bible was written in language that regular Jews and Gentiles understood. Now, traditional churches use language that only exists in church, so there is a huge disconnect that is perpetuated by church, instead of building bridges to lost people.

Thus, in traditional churches, for a person to be saved, they must not only change religion from whatever to Christianity, they must also stop being 21st century Americans and become 17th-18th century Englishmen!

Sure, Victorian England is cool and all, but why should that culture be the only way to properly worship God?

I think that every culture should have a way to worship God in their own way without bringing in paganism or idolatry or heresy or impurity. There's a bunch of stuff in the Bible about every tribe, tongue, and nation worshiping God.

Is This Thing On??

I think it's been about a month since I last posted. Here's a synopsis of what has happened.

--Preaching class has taken a lot of my time. I generally have good content, but I'm having trouble with enthusiasm in delivery. I'm still working on it, though.

--The youth pastor thing in TN did not work out. We had an interview over the phone, but I was not that excited about the area (too Bible-belt), and the church (too traditional). They were not excited by my lack of experience and fascination with the emerging church movement. So, it looks like Virginia is still a go! (where 85% of the people do not go to church, and I can have the freedom to build a church according to the way that God has put me together)

--Church at North Point Fellowship is trucking along. I'm still struggling to find my place there.

--I'm having a really hard time with the job search arena as far as DC area employment is concerned. I really need prayer for this! (Curse my worthless WSU diploma!)

--Spring Break is next week and I cannot wait! I have a vacation from work that week as well. I am really going to enjoy it!

David and Saul

Normally, I hate to broadcast my shortcomings, but I also realize that I can't afford to broadcast only my victories. Hopefully, I'm not being too transparent.

Here's the thing: I know I'm good at a lot of things. But on the flip side of that, I know I'm not the best at anything, and I never will be. The thing is, many times I just resent the people that are better than me.

Let me rephrase that, the thing I really resent is when I see people with less talent than I have get better results than I get. It's not fair. In a way, I'm like the jerkface, whiney, second string quarterback, stirring up trouble in order to secure the top spot for myself.

I can really identify with David, the hot-shot upstart thrust into second place in the kingdom of Israel. But I have not yet learned the lesson never to lay a hand on the LORD's annointed (1 Sam 24). Unfortunately, that makes me more like David's son, Absalom, who went behind the king's back to create a following and usurp the kingdom (2 Sam 15). And that is why I think I'm still on the sidelines.

So there you have it. I'm not proud of it. The only thing left for me to do is repent of it and stop doing it. It's time to realize that I don't have to be the best. Maybe it would help to see things from God's perspective, to celebrate His victories and gifts, regardless of who He chooses to bless. I've done it before, so it's now a matter of consistently applying it.

I don't like being a disaffected malcontent all the time.

Hopefully, the first step toward recovery really is to admit you have a problem.

A Double Dose of Sermons

Well, I just finished paper number one this semester, and I'm off to my next project(s). Next Sunday I am preaching at North Point (where I'm helping out with music), and I am really looking forward to it. I'm preaching on Acts 13:47-48, and it's a very special passage to me. As I see it, this wraps up the mission of the church in a nice, neat little package.

Basically, if I get the opportunity to plant a church, it would be based on this passage, and I would most likely preach from it the first week. So I'm looking at this Sunday as a rough draft to the future.

But not only that, it will be a great opportunity to challenge the church I'm at to think about their goals, and give them some concrete ideas for outreach and growth.

In addition, I have a sermon due for preaching class three days later, which I am (perhaps foolishly) taking from a completely different passage. That one will be from Psalm 37 on dealing with enemies.

If you read this, pray for me. I'm going to try to use my preaching opportunity to invite some people from work who aren't exactly the "churchy" type. Should be exciting.

Preaching to the Pastor

I'm taking Advanced Preaching this semester, and I'm finding more to love and more to hate about preparing sermons. One of the biggest things I love is doing the background work, and digging up new information, making new connections across Scripture, and seeing how God worked in the Bible and the possibilities of how He can still work today.

Then comes the application. Not that I hate discovering how God's truth back then still works out for us today, but I hate what that invariably means for me: change.

Here's the dealio: I'm working on a sermon for class, and it's from Exodus 34, where Moses prays to God after God promised to restore His covenant when Israel had broken it. What I'm struck with, though, is how different this little prayer is from my own prayer life. Basically, I suck at praying, and that's unacceptable.

Sure, I like praying to God. I'm just undisciplined and spend most of the time trying to figure out what to pray. I also think that people unwittingly do others a disservice when they describe prayer as "just talking to God." That may be less intimidating to the neophytes, but we should really work harder at training prayer warriors. In my experience, I've found very few people who can do more than thank God for the day, and for being who He is.

Here's my point. It's time for me and thee to really start looking to pray like the men and women of God in the Bible. Instead of just thanking God for who He is, let's find out exactly who He is in the Bible and in our current lives and thank and praise Him for specific things, ask Him for things like "going in our midst," and even (gasp!) confessing specific instances of our sinfulness, and repenting of it.



Yikes! Who knows what may happen after all this? It boggles the mind.

Opportunity Knox?

I just got an email from some old friends from my Wichita church. They moved to Tennessee about 5 years ago or so with the Air National Guard. As it happens, their church is sans Youth Pastor, and my old Sunday School Teachers thought of me.

Hmmm. Me in Tennessee? Anyway, we'll see how things go. I told them to read this blog to get an accurate picture of my goals and beliefs. It may not go beyond that.... ;) Then again, they may love it. Who knows?

So pray for me, everybody. I'm not really sure what to make of this yet. I'm just trying to see what God has up His sleeve.

Oh, by the way, the church is in Knox County, hence the clever title.

First Set Free Bible Study

Today was my first Bible study with Set Free. It went great. Some of the guys could really identify with the concept of suffering despite being right.

There were around 12 guys there. Almost all of them come from a background of drugs and/or alcohol. But God has done an amazing work in their lives, and it is so obvious. Also, these guys are so refreshingly real. They have no pretensions about any part of their life. That kind of environment helped me to open up as well.

I have met many people in churches who are superficial, and it is really stifling. Church begins to feel competitive and forces you to put up your own barriers. But when you can go to a church and just be yourself, and know that people will still accept you and love you, that's a great feeling.

Here's just an example of what I'm experiencing: one guy commented, "when you can drive by a prostitute out in the cold weather, slip her a 20 and not expect anything in return, then let her know that Jesus can rescue her from this, you know that God has changed your life!"

When was the last time you heard that in a Bible study??

2 Corinthians 1

I thought that I'd take the time to share some of the things from the Bible Study I'm doing with the Set Free church. We'll be going through the book of 2 Corinthians, one of my absolute favorites!

When Paul wrote the letter, the situation at Corinth was a mess. A small group of people were slandering Paul for "breaking promises" dealing with travel plans. They were saying that all his sufferings proved that Paul was not approved by God. So Paul wrote back his most rhetorically amazing letter. In it, Paul seeks to prove his qualifications as an apostle. The big question of the letter is found in 2:16, "who is qualified/adequate/sufficient for these things?" What are "these things"? We'll find out as we go.

The most important part of a biblical letter is the blessing/thanksgiving at the beginning. Paul begins by blessing the "God of all comfort." It's important to note here that comfort is a result of suffering, and not just any suffering, but suffering for the sake of the Gospel: persecution. And this comfort is God's blessing to us to bless others with. It is not merely ours to keep. There is a community for us to share testimonies of God's faithfulness and grace in times of hardship, to encourage others to persevere under pressure. "Patient endurance" is the outward sign of this comfort (v.6).

Then Paul gives a weird promise in verse 7. He says that the sufferings of the Corinthian church are a guarantee of God's comfort to come. Think about that: suffering guarantees comfort.

So what does this mean for you?

1) When you suffer, experience hardship, or are wrongly accused, you're in good company: the apostles, saints in history, the present church, even our Lord Jesus endured suffering, and we can too, because we're not alone.
2) The comfort and consolation and patience you receive through these trials is meant to be passed on to others. God's pattern from Gen 12:2 on has always been to bless one person who will then pass on that blessing to others, and so on, and so on.....
3) Endurance and patience are not passive resignation to the unchangeable, but rather, an active bearing up under hardship, in the confidence that God will absolutely deliver you from this (even if that means through death, like it eventually meant for Paul).
4) Two of the most prominent marks of a true believer in the New Testament are: a) experiencing trials and hardships, and b) patiently enduring them. Do these describe you? If not, why not?

I'll pick up with verse 8 next time. I'm trying to keep these reasonably short.

What Would Jesus Sing?

This is one of those things that I don't think anyone would find profound but me, but I was thinking tonight about Jesus singing. I don't recall that I've ever heard anyone ever talk about Jesus singing. The more I thought about it though, I just wondered how weird it would be with all those Psalms about the Jewish Messiah. Would Jesus sing about himself?

Surely he sang often. Jewish liturgy would almost demand it. But what about in his free time? Did he have one of the apostles lead in worship before the sermon on the mount. Did he have private worship times when he went alone to pray? I can only guess that he directed the worship toward the Father, but the whole trinity thing is way beyond me.

Then I wonder, would Jesus ever sing about us? Of course not in worship, but if we sing when we're happy, did Jesus sing when he was happy with his disciples? In the preschool Sunday School class, we have songs where we can insert every child's name and sing about them. Would Jesus sing songs like that about his children?

I've heard the phrase "God loves you/me" so many times that it really doesn't strike me as amazing anymore. I get more excited when I think that God actually LIKES me, is proud of me, is working for my good, is on my side, gave his life to rescue me, enjoys my company, likes it when I use the gifts he gave me, is happy when I work with my brothers and sisters, and so on.

While I can't answer any of my own rhetorical questions, it is quite a comforting thought to think about Jesus in heaven singing, "I love Andrew, this you know, for my Gospel tells you so."

New Bible Study

As some of you may know, I do the music for Set Free ministry's weekly services. They are a church based out of Los Angeles that reaches out to the kind of people that most churches want nothing to do with: homeless, drug addicts, alcoholics, gang members, ex-cons, and so on. Two of the bigger churches are Set Free Skid Row, and Set Free Yucaipa.

Their program is simple. They bring people off the streets, out of their negative environment, and give them a regimented program of discipline, health, work, Bible study, and positive community.

Since the Kansas City Set Free is so small, pastor Reggie depends on other local pastors or leaders to come in and help out with the daily Bible studies. So starting next week, I'm going to be leading one of their Bible studies, and right now I'm planning on going through 2 Corinthians ("when I am weak, then I am strong").

It's going to be pretty challenging to try to relate the message to people I have so little in common with. However, I'm hoping to really learn a lot about this important group of people, the "tax collectors, prostitutes, and sinners" of our generation.

In my opinion, people have a lot more in common each other than we'd like to admit. We all have family problems, hidden sins, embarrassing failures, and hopes and dreams for a better future. While we don't all sin in the same way, all have sinned, and we all need the same Jesus to forgive our sins and restore us to God.

So if you get a chance, send up a quick prayer to God to help me through this. I'm really looking forward to it!!

Waiting on the World to Change

Go ahead and call me dumb, but John Mayer's Waiting on the World to Change (I kinda like this churchified video) keeps playing in my head, over and over and over. I'm not really a fan of his, but I definitely identify with the sentiment. Is this really the best we can do as a state, as a country, as a world, as a church??

My basic life goal is to make a measurable difference for the better. Thus far, I haven't been put in a position to change things. It's frustrating. I wonder sometimes that if I am put in a position to change things, by the time will I have lost all the naive enthusiasm and optimism that I now have? Is it possible that I might hinder a young idealist like me and turn him into just another old cynical curmudgeon?

But here's the thing: people all over the world have been "waiting on the world to change" since the beginning. Why can't humans get it right? Why can't we achieve that elusive Utopian society? Now that all the Hippies and Yuppies have each had their chance to rule America, are we any better off??

Romans 8:18-25 tells us that all creation is frustrated and groaning, waiting on Jesus to restore everything.

My generation is getting ready to step up to the plate and take our turn with the world. I'm pretty confident that by the time I'm 60-ish the young people will still be complaining about the same things that I'm tired of.

However, while we may not be able to change the world, we can definitely impact our families, our churches, our jobs, and our communities. One person can absolutely make a difference, and several people together can make a big difference. So let's get started making our little differences and trust that Jesus is still coming back to change the whole world into an actual Utopia. In this way, we are "Changing the World While We Wait" for Jesus. Maybe someone can make a catchy song out of that phrase.

I Woulda Gotten Away with It, Too...

Let me just say, I'm the kind of person that doesn't get away with anything. While I haven't seen the earth swallow anyone, or fiery hailstones, or poisonous snakes, I can still see a direct correlation between certain willful sins that I do and external events.

Don't get me wrong, I still like God. I don't see Him as some kind of "Soup-Nazi-esque" prison warden, waiting to smack me down whenever I mess up. There's another side to it. That is, when I deliberately disobey something basic to Christianity, God has to hold me accountable for my actions. What's weird is, my punishments can never make up for my mistakes and rebellions. Sometimes I wish God worked like a Catholic priest, where I could just do my penance and never worry about anymore consequences. But that's not how it works.

The thing is, even in discipline there is grace. Thus far, my punishments have never fit the crime. Even more, I still have too many blessings to count!

God's punishments should throw us back into repentance and dependence and trust in Jesus. Jesus makes us right with God, and keeps us right with God. The grace of God frees me to serve Him and others with clean hands and a pure heart.

So praise God when He holds you accountable, because, after all, it means that He still "holds you."

The Missing Piece

With my imminent career in ministry as a pastor somewhere, I am increasingly convicted by my lack of vision, as far as big picture Christianity is concerned. I am struggling to find the "missing piece" of the puzzle, the "keystone," the "unified theory" that will put all this stuff that is swimming around in my head together. I feel like I'm at the eye doctor trying out lenses; he keeps asking "better or worse?" and I can't figure it out.

Here's what I know: I am dissatisfied with a lot of what I read about church and purpose. So much is wrapped up in individualism. That is, the way sanctification (or progressive holiness, if that even exists) happens is by personal prayer, personal Bible study, personal avoidance of sin, and personal evangelism. Well, if that is our goal, then all the church can do is train and instruct. This church is bringing people into the Kingdom.

Yet, I find that insufficient. So much of the Bible (especially the New Testament) is group-based and community-oriented. That is, God has made for himself a people, rather than a bunch of persons.

Granted, we don't lose our individual personalities, but what I mean is that the whole (community) is vastly greater than the sum of its parts (the individuals). Each individual has a key part to play in the functioning of the body. Each individual makes a difference in the body of Christ. Sanctification happens in community as believers exercise their spiritual gifts toward each other, as believers serve one another, and as believers take (as a team) the gospel to the lost.

In this way, the function of the church becomes taking the kingdom to the people. This church is focused outward, showing their faith by their works, experiencing the full life, even on earth, that Jesus promised. They are no longer working for the weekend (heaven), they are living in the present. In this way, God is more glorified by a visible community of living faith, rather than enjoying him privately (take THAT, John Piper!)

Politics, Comedians, and Persecution

Last night I was watching Conan O'Brien after work, and one of his guests was Bill Maher, a political comedian with a show on HBO. As usual for political humor, his stuff was only funny to those with an intimate knowledge of current political events and the political process: so basically, four people in the US would find him funny.

Anyway, he said some of the harshest words against Christians I think I have ever heard in my life. He really made fun of Mike Huckabee for being a Christian and believing in "talking snakes" and not believing in evolution. Then he said that he couldn't understand how a person can be rational six days a week, go to a normal job, then put that aside for one day and go to a place to "drink the blood of a 2,000 year old space god." (the full episode should be available for viewing by monday or so from www.nbc.com/conan)

Maher claims that his hatred for Christianity (including the Mormonism of Mitt Romney) is purely rational, but his remarks are clearly an egregious overreaction. What on earth causes people to hate Christians so much? What on earth happened to tolerance? When a comedian says something horrible, it's considered edgy and covered by the first amendment. When a pastor says something horrible, it's intolerant and punishable by hate crime legislation. I think the phrase I'm looking for is "double standard," but I wish there were an uglier term I could use.

While my instinctive reaction is to make fun of him back, maybe I should turn the other cheek like Jesus said. Maybe more, I can rejoice that I am considered worthy to suffer for the name of Jesus (Acts 5:41), even though mine has all been emotional and never physical abuse. I think I'll choose to love my enemies and pray for those who persecute me, rather than responding with litigation or slander.